I’ll tell you now I've got my needs and I get them all from super Leeds
If I want to be in plaster I’ll have a drink in Doncaster
If I want things to go sorely I’ll take a trip to sunny Morley
If I want my looks molten I’ll take a drive to friendly Halton or maybe concede to visit Colton

You can see the common fault from all these places that I bolt
The wine, the women, drink and more all come from an Ann Summers store Manufactured perculated, patterned fashioned but not elated

I just want to stay in my town not cross a border to get rundown
By a joy rider full of hate taking a trip from Harrogate
Or Wakefield where the thrills are cheap
But you find yourself waist deep in a gene pool where monsters sleep or terror runs around your feet

London's full of scary folk who rush around - can't take a joke.
No pavements that are made of gold
And the mad prices properties sold
Who has the most but just wants to boast
Or buy a football club and be the host

Power corrupts we've seen
Perhaps I’ll hide in Hornbeam
In grey plaid I’ll never be seen
And dare I say God bless the queen
Or Elton John or George Michael whose place or abode is Hichael Smichael

So as my sweat beads
Please take me back to mighty Leeds

The man, the myth, the town and all might resemble an ugly bug ball
But I’ll still take it warts and all
Leeds, Leeds please hear my call.







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